Answering the boys’ questions about S-E-X was a cakewalk compared to the ones I’ve been getting (mostly from Lex) lately.
- During supper, with everyone at the table, "MOM, what’s a hooker?"
- Whispered in my ear while I made lunch, "MOM, what’s crack?"
- Shouted to me while walking home from school today (I was several paces ahead because Lex was wearing heelies, eating a popsicle, and wearing a box on his head), "MOM!! What’s a eunuch?" to which I managed to hem and haw something about a eunuch being a servant and how is that popsicle? it sure looks good! Lex then yelled back, "SO, a servant who isn’t allowed to get married?" YES! EXACTLY!!
- And from Sophie, "I’m gonna die someday, right?"
Jeez, children, give your poor mother a break and get interested in kid stuff for awhile, okay?
Willow is really snotty and feverish and in the middle of a nasty ear infection. She keeps taking off her clothes because she is hot, and then she comes to me in her diaper (still working on that. . . ) and her care bearz cropped tank top and says, "Wanna bwankwet. I feeeee-zing." Right now she’s bundled up on the couch watching a busytown video, which she calls "Wicherd Scawwy." (Richard Scarry writes the busytown books, and how she connected that, I do not know. She also looked at the door of the exam room we sat in at the county clinic last night and said, "Three!" which was the number on the door. She seems to be scary smart.)
Edited to add: I’m closing comments because this one entry seems to be attracting tons of spam.
At least Sophie isn’t as morbid as my kids. When my mom visited last, Bebe kept saying to her, “You’re going to die, right? ‘Cause you’re old!” Thankfully, my mom thought this was hysterical.
And when the girls all watched “Bambi” a few months ago, they made me rewind the scene where the mother bites it so they could watch it again. I may be raising three little future Quentin Tarantinos. Heh.
Oh I just can’t WAIT for THOSE questions! Done the S-E-X one with Reece (11) and was interestingly informed on that same issue by Gage (5) (as per my post). Where are the ‘simple’ kid questions? Why is the sky blue? Why don’t we fall over if the Earth is always moving? Why can’t I have a chocolate bar before my dinner? Please?
I like Lex’s questions.
(but does that mean I’m gonna get my upcomin’s soon? cuz I don’t wanna)
Just think, Jen: you’re making smart kids.
I’m loving the idea that they’re asking questions and trust you to give them good answers. I avoided asking questions a lot because my older siblings would razz the hell out of me for asking weird/dumb/baby-ish stuff.
Your children obviously receive WAY too much intellectual stimulation and health, brain-supporting foods. Plunk ’em in front of the TV with some sugary treats for a few days, and they’ll get all sluggish and slow-witted, and you’ll have no worries!
I KID. DO NOT SEND ME LETTERS.
Although I know I shouldn’t admit this as a mother who is duty-bound to promote healthy developmental progress, etc., the r-sound rendered as w’s in little-kid-speak is so heartmeltingly cute.