Dear Kids,

I just made your lunches for camp tomorrow and I’d like to point out that while you may never quite get over my refusal to buy you lunchables, I did just put 3 chocolate chip cookies AND a box of Cracker Jacks into each of your ratty torn up lunchboxes.  It’s true that Cracker Jacks have had to adapt to the crappy economy by only putting four peanuts in each box and converting to all flat paper prizes (This is “true” in that I’ve had two boxes in the past five years and the peanuts were scarce and the prizes were flat paper.  I could be wrong.  It’s just MY true, you know?) but still I bet y’all are the only four kids at camp tomorrow with boxes of Cracker Jacks and if you aren’t then you’ll probably be the only ones with Cracker Jacks AND cookies.  I threw in some organic plums and carrots to balance it out, so you’ll be fine.   

I frankly don’t have the time to do the Bento thing on a regular basis, but if I did, I would probably go overboard and get all into making stuff like this.  Because, ooooooh, pretty!  But then that might cause a weird dynamic between us, because, what if, God forbid, I spent two days executing on something like this, and you’re all RAW HAM?  NO WAY LADY!  And then lunches would be a “thing” and we’d have trust issues and instead of letting me live with you when I’m old, you’d all vote to put me in a home so I wouldn’t try and feed you lunch. 

Anyway, I hope you all have fun tomorrow, and since not all of you have even ever HAD Cracker Jacks, I hope you like them.  I hope your prizes are novel enough to make you happy.  Please remember to reapply the sunscreen, and try to bring home some of the beach towels I know you’ve left behind.  Otherwise, you may have to lay on a washcloth next time we go over the hill and nobody wants that.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you I love you and thanks for the extra help tonight.  Sleep tight and I’ll see you in the morning.
xoxoxo mom

2 thoughts on “Dear Kids,

  1. Robert-Gilles Martineau

    Dear Friend!
    Greetings from Shizuoka, Japan!
    Thank you for linking your posting to my blog!
    I had to read your article twice! I actually found it very funny, but that was probably your intention!
    Once again thank you so much!
    Best regards,


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *