Taking a break from the kids has turned me into Mommy Dearest. I have no patience. They are too loud, whiny, and demanding, and they want me to do things I know they can do themselves. They poke me and fight and use words they ought not to.
I need to take a step back and get a grip and take proper care of them again, but I find that I feel not a small amount of resentment toward them. Which, just. . . I need to get a grip! Like I always say, I knew the job was dangerous when I took it. I think maybe I just need to deal with other things going on so I can be a nice mama again. Not that I was ever stellar about not yelling and all that, but things are definitely not so great around here. The worst part is that I can see and hear how I’m treating them and I do it anyway. (uh, note to anyone overly concerned: no need to call cps or anything, I’m not, like, beating them or calling them names, I’m just using too much volume) And I have no one to blame but myself, so I guess starting now I will just suck it up, step up to the plate or whatever, and PLAY NICE.
wish me luck
edited at 8:37 pm to add:
Tonight being a better parent means letting the kids stay up a little bit after bedtime to finish watching Flubber instead of shrieking at them about taking a bath. If there is one thing I am good at, it is going from one extreme to the other.